How does a priest keep the confession of a grievous sin by someone he knows from affecting his relationship with that person?

George


Dear George,

One of a priest's most sacred responsibilities is the confidentiality of the confessional. This confidentiality encompasses everyone, even the priest and penitent outside the confessional. A priest is not allowed to discuss the con­fessed sin with the person unless permission is granted for further counsel­ing. The confessor is also forbidden to use any knowledge gained through the sacrament of reconciliation to restrict the penitent. For instance, if a pas­tor's bookkeeper confessed he was embezzling money, the pastor could not use the knowledge acquired in the confessional to fire the person.

Sometimes, remembering the sins of parishioners helps me minister to them. Knowing their struggles allows me to walk with them on their jour­neys, to be a support in times of temptation and weakness, to better under­stand their pain. In such a case, I usually ask the person if we can talk further aboutthe issue.

Priests generally try to forget the specific sins parishioners confess to us, and it really isn't that difficult. Contrary to what many think, a parishioner's sins do not rush into my mind when I speak to him or her. The grace of the sac­rament allows us to understand that we are all sinners. We have all sinned, done things we are ashamed of, things we wouldn't want anyone to know about, things we would not want others to define us by. This knowledge and the grace ofthe sacrament help us look past the mistakes of others and recog­nize Christ within them.

Father Rick Potts, C.Ss.R.